Jan 3 - A bad few days, and a few bad jokes.

It is 03:48 on the morning of 3 Jan 2016.
The last few days have been rough on me. But Happy New Year to you anyway, (if you use the Gregorian calendar).
I wonder what percentage of the world does.
When I was in Addis Ababa, at the airport they had the Gregorian, Islamic, and the Coptic (Julian?) calendars on the wall. If you get confused with time zones, you better stay away from the different calendars.

I think the chemo gave me diarrhea again. Today was the second day without even opening the front door. I really need to feel the sun. I also need to take out the trash, as it stinks bad. It is hard to be philosophical when the trash stinks.

 I get so tired talking about my various illnesses. I sometimes just want
to keep it to myself.
The short version....New Years Day. I puked 5 times between 03:30 and 09:00. I spilled the puke bowl on the carpet. I had diarrhea bad. I messed 2 underwear so I put on a diaper, then of course nothing happened. I took 3 showers in that time. I was so hot and sweaty I laid under the ceiling fan on high. Then at about 05:00 I got cold. Tracksuit and duvet till 09:00.
When I puked, it was chicken breast and veggies. They looked like they had
just gone in. I ate them around 20:00, and at 03:00 they still were in the stomach, and looked perfect.
No digestion at all. I don't know? 

Yesterday was a man diaper day. I call it a man diaper, like a purse can be called a man bag. But a man bag it still just a purse, and what I wear, is still just a diaper.

I should have put it on sooner. Why on earth would I delay putting on a diaper? Like I'm afraid someone will see me? I might get embarrassed? It must be an Alpha male sort of thing. "I won't let some silly diarrhea tell ME what to do!"

I have been eating toast with anchovies paste for two days. I need some real food.
But most of all I need a good nights sleep. I have slept so much the last few days, that I fear tonight will be a sleepless night.
The night isn't over yet, so maybe I'll drift off. But I doubt it. Too much phantom pain.

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I'm up at 09:30. Just took a shower. I thought I stank, but it is the trash.

House has no eggs, no milk, and no bread. 

I got the most wonderful video from my friends in Texas. That did my soul a heap of good. 

 My whole thinking towards blacks has changed in the last few months. Most are so caring toward any old or disabled people. Just the opposite of whites. White people suck. I now always ask a black for help, and I talk to each one. After chemo, I asked a black guy to help me with the parking ticket computer because it didn't want to take my money, and I was balanced on crutches. All the white people in the line behind me were just impatient, none offered to help me. He was so kind and helpful. When done, in Setswana I said " I have seen what you have done for me." (That is how they say "thank you"). He looked at me and said back in Setswana " Thank you my grandfather. You have seen me as a man. I have seen what you have done for me."

 It was like I was the first person that day that treated this parking

 attendant as a man, and not as a nothing.

Blacks seem more "people" oriented, where whites are more "things" oriented. The black people in South Africa did not have even a wheel before the white man came. Their culture is different, and it is changing at a much faster rate than the white culture is changing. Blacks are moving from spears to cyber warfare in just 120 years. Whites are only moving from guns to cyber warfare in that time.

The problem is when blacks try to act like whites, with politics, and running large corporations. That just doesn't work. 

The Saudis have the right idea. If you want something done, hire someone to do that job. 

The blacks seem to think more along the lines of "If a white man can do it, then I can also do it." If the black man would accept and "use" the white man to do, what white men do best, like the Saudis do, then South Africa would be a much better place.

Hmmm...I just used 3 "do"s in one sentence.

 I am chewing on a big chunk of Venison biltong. My hemoglobin count was low last blood test. I need to eat lots of liver, I am sorry, that is just not going to happen. Biltong will have to do.

Last night I got the brilliant idea of doing laundry in very small batches, and hanging it in the shower. I installed one of those expandable laundry racks in the top of my shower. With my fancy overhead bar in the shower, I could easily hang laundry up there.

At chemo I asked the oncologist why my good leg was now swollen up like my bad leg was before they chopped it off. She answered, "Oh, that could be the Paclitaxel, or maybe it is the Tramacet, or maybe because you sit all day in a wheelchair, or maybe it is the other chemo drugs we are giving you, then again it may be the Robaxin, and of course you don't walk like you used to, I don't think it is the angiosarcoma.."
I think a blatant "I DON"T KNOW." would have been sufficient. That seem to be the angiosarcoma motto "I DON'T KNOW!".

The thing that makes me most despondent is that the treatment they do for cancer just doesn't work. Like they are saying. "We are going to give you drugs to make you very sick, and they will wreck your whole life. You will still soon die of cancer, but at least we are doing "something", even if what we are doing doesn't work."
Maybe they should try leeches.
It is like building a car that you know will kill people, but you don't know any other way to build a car, so you just keep building it over and over. After all,  it still makes you money.

I need to figure out how to take out the trash.
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Cancer Jokes:

 A woman visits her doctor complaining of a strange feeling in her lower stomach. The doctor examines her and states;
"Well, I can tell you that you'll need to be buying lots of nappies in about nine months time."
"Am I pregnant? That is wonderful news."
"No, you have bowel cancer."

I needed a new wallet. I went into a store and found one guaranteed for life. I asked the clerk, "Don't you have one that will last longer than this crap?"

The Doctor calls.  "I have good news and bad news. Which will you have first?"
"The good news." "OK. The reports say that your cancer has metastasized all over and that you have 48 hours to live."
"You call that good news? It must be the bad news. What could possibly be worse?"
"Well, the bad news is that I tried to call you yesterday."


A man isn't feeling well, so he goes to see his doctor. The doctor examines him, and then asks to speak with his wife. The doctor tells his wife that her husband has cancer. The wife asks "can he be cured?".
The doctor replies "there's a chance we can cure him with chemotherapy, but you will need to take care of him every day for the next year - cooking all the meals, cleaning up the vomit, changing the bed pan, getting little sleep, washing diapers, driving him to the hospital for daily treatments, and so on".
When the wife comes out to the waiting room, the husband asks her what the doctor said.
The wife answers "He said that you're going to die".


A man hears from his doctor that he has cancer and only has six months to live. The doctor
recommends that he marry a nice Jewish girl and move to a secluded ranch in Montana. 
The man asks,
"Will this cure my cancer?" "No," said the doctor, "but the six months will seem much longer!

Doctor: The tests show that your cancer is advanced. You have six months to live.
Patient: But, doc, I can't pay off my medical bills in six months.
Doctor: In that case, I will give you a year.

 Doctor: "It's bad news, you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
Patient: "Oh well, it could be worse - at least I don't have cancer."

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