Day 41 - Blood Test

Today was a blood test. The oncologist will use those results to determine if the chemo mixture needs to be changed any for this next chemo treatment. I'll get a blood test one day before each chemo treatment. I do my second chemo treatment tomorrow at 13:30.
The beetle is still starter less, so I will take a taxi cab both to the hospital, and from the hospital.

One thing they look for is the red blood cell count. This will tell if your blood can take enough oxygen to the body. If it is low, then you have anemia, and feel tired all the time.

Another thing is the platelet count. Low platelets means the blood won't clot as well. So I will be at risk of bleeding lots. I did have a bloody nose the other day. My first in years.

The last thing they check is white blood cells. These are used to fight disease. Low blood cell count is called Leukemia. Chemo gives you Leukemia. So we may stop the tumors from growing, only to die from Leukemia.

Both platelets, and white blood cells come from the bone marrow. To me it seems that we should be doing everything to improve the white blood cell count, and the platelets. Not trying to kill them. We should be trying to improve the bodies ability to fight disease, not stop the bodies ability to fight disease.
 This whole chemo thing just seems so counter productive. But that is where the $$$ are, so that is what the doctors will keep doing.

I am afraid of what doctors are doing to my body.  I am also afraid of what cancer is doing to my body. I don't know which scares me worst. Either way, I don't think I will like what the future holds.

I need to work on pleasures that do not rely on the past, and don't depend on the future.