It's time to put my thoughts into
words again. I haven't done that for a long time, and so much has
happened in the meanwhile. I've arrived here on 22nd of
October, the day before Dan's life changing operation.
My first few days were all about
hospital visits, cleaning house etc. Since Dan came out of hospital,
a few things changed - I suddenly had a 'patient' to take care of
and had to start practising my 'nursing skills'. :-) As the time
passes, I realise that I'm very willing, but I don't always have the
necessary skills or knowledge to help our dear friend when he's in
pain, or when the black dog wants to drag him down into a hole.
Fortunately that doesn't last for too long, as he's able to pull
himself together again when the pain has subsided. Even if I can't
do anything more, I'm always there to listen whenever he wants to
talk. To me, it seems if it helps if his mind is occupied with
something, like discussing projects, watching a hilarious comedy on
TV or physically challenge himself by walking in the street, climbing
stairs at the big mall, fixing a fan or fiddling with something or
other in the shed outside the house.
Today we discussed our schedule for
this coming week. We both look forward getting the new car, maybe
Tuesday. It has an aircon, which is a HUGE plus during the hot
summer months. Dan will be able to drive himself, so nothing will
stop him from driving to Communica, shopping for parts for his table
on wheels to use around the house. We'll still have the beetle, if I
need to go somewhere and Dan is out with the Atos. Of course I'll be
jealous of him driving the cute little Atos :-) so maybe we'll make
turns to go out, if not together. I think driving his own car will
be good for his mental state and his soul – a good start to be
independent again.
We talked about “This too shall pass”
… It is a phrase that should bring hope, that whatever bad
situation you're in, will also pass with time.
Dan feels that some things will never
change for him – never again will he be able to jump in a
Corvette and race his friend in another Corvette to a nearby town, or
the two of them go for a speed race on the fast motor cycles. The
thought of that made us both sad.:-( We then started talking about
the prosthesis that will give so much more quality of life back to
him, and we both cheered up again. All in good time, we decided.
Trying to speed things up and regret it afterwards, is not the way to
go.
If we've got our dates correct, the
last chemo session will be 30th December. Then two weeks
after that the PET scan. We dream of flying out to Florida to see
some of Dan's friends, from there to Washington to visit his brother.
Then fly from there to Texas for a visit to some very wonderful
friends and spend time on their ranch. We realise that so much
depends on the outcome of the PET scan, somewhere in January, but for
now nothing is stopping us from dreaming, hoping and being positive.
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